Look, I just want to watch some f*@#ing Star Trek.

We canceled our cable television service over a year ago. We did it mostly for budgetary reasons. We po' and it seems asinine to spend so much money on so much garbage programming. However, we would still need to keep our internet service with They Who Shall Not Be Named. Due to several complications with downgrading, I found myself in a heated debate with an incredibly pompus customer service agent. I suggested that there might be a good reason why consumers recently voted that TWSNBN is America's Worst Company (go ahead, Google it) and dude tells me that I'm not very bright if I get my information on the internet. Give that a minute to soak in. Let's just say that I flipped my shit with such vigor that I scored a year of less-than-half priced internet service.

So, fast forward to present day. We've been rolling with only internet access and Netflix to sate us ever since. I feel like I'm better off this way, I'm more productive, and when I sit down to watch something it's intentional and not just mindless channel surfing. I don't care what's on whatever day at what time. I don't have to be home to watch it or find a way to record it. I don't worry about missing the next episode of True Blood because I've never seen an episode of True Blood and I don't care and it's AWESOME.

Bonus: When someone asks if I saw that that thing that happened on that show that time, it allows me to snootily respond, "Oh, I don't watch television."

Ha. Eat it.

I can watch the Office and Hoarders and Battlestar Galactica and whatever else floats my boat and if Netflix doesn't have the latest season or the newest episodes I do not care because I'm not hearing about it on every godforsaken commercial break. Oh, and STAR TREK THE NEXT GENERATION. EVERY BLESSED EPISODE.

Nah, y'all just keep your cable. I'm solid.

Other benefits:

• No commercials to make me want to buy things I don't need. 
• No food commercials making me frantically dial out for pizza on a whim. 
• No one making me feel bad about my cellulite/wrinkles/complexion in the hopes that I'll buy some tube of poison to give me the taut skin of a nubile lingerie model.

Netflix protects me from myself while simultaneously placating my need for some sort of prerecorded stimuli, and this is why I heart it. Just the right dose of the right medicine. Yes, yes, I know all about the price increase for Streaming + DVD plans. Frankly, I think even the increased price is a pittance for what Netflix provides, but I am concerned that this move is going to bite them in the ass. We actually decreased our service to Unlimited Streaming only for $7.99 a month. Netflix has been so efficient in weening us off of our television addiction that we feel we can do with even less service. Instead of getting more cash out of us, they're now getting less and we're saving more. And I'm sure we're not the only ones. Whether the new pricing will hurt them remains to be seen, but I am feeling no pain.

I don't even know.

Emergency Hurricane Preparedness, Ginger-Style

I sit here awaiting the arrival of Hurricane Irene. While we won't be seeing the worst of it here in Pennsylvania, we're expecting high winds and a lot of rain, and around here that's probably enough to knock the power out for at least a few hours at some point. We've battened down the hatches, and I've had time to reflect on the utter ridiculousness of my preparedness measures.

I have an obsession with survival gear. I get hot every time I see one of those survival backpacks with rations and medical equipment for X-number of people for X-number of days. That could warrant an entire post of its own, but I'll just cut to the chase and say that survival gear is hella expensive and I can't afford it. So instead I do frantic, nonsensical menial tasks under the guise of readiness. I'm sure it's some sort of coping mechanism.

In order of most reasonable to completely unhelpful, this was my day:

1. Brought the patio furniture into the garage
2. Put my car in the garage
3. Cleaned the giant plug of leaf-gunk out of the rain gutters
4. Got the hurricane lamps ready
5. Got out the box of candles
6. Got out crates for the furbabies in case we need to round them up
7. Filled 4 gallon jugs with water
8. Baked a loaf of bread (even though I have two frozen already)
9. Washed all of the towels (in case the power goes out... I think)
10. Washed and put away every dish (meh?)
11. Updated my iPhone (emergency tunes!)
12. Worked out extra hard (because survival!)
13. Bought a giant box of wine (in case of emergency... wine.)

So I guess we're prepared. For what, I don't really know. I suppose if a dozen waterlogged people end up stranded at our house we can dry them, ply them with wine and sandwiches and entertain them with sweet tunes, even if the power is out.

See you cats on the other side!