I Make Lists: 5 of My Mediocre Superpowers

I've never really had one talent at which I am supremely awesome. I was a passable soccer player, but I was never amazing. I'm a pretty decent artist, but not so good that I'd win any competitions. I can't sing, can't play an instrument and cannot do a cartwheel to save my life.

That said, I have acquired a few rather mediocre superpowers that make me proud...

I can stomp around in 4-inch heels all night. I had a job for awhile that required full-time business dress and gave me an excuse to splurge on some high-powered heels. I'm 5' 7" + change barefoot, so in my 4-inch stilettos I'm all but 6-feet tall and I kind of love it. Also, every time I hear "Wow, how can you walk in those?!" (which is pretty often, actually) I secretly give myself a little pat on the back.

Fix confusing internet things. What kind of internet things? Round up all the miscellaneous interweb tasks that the people you know can't seem to do and that's pretty much my skillset. Yes, I can figure out why your website is broken, your email won't send, or you can't locate that site you just had yesterday. I can tell you why your preferences are screwed up, your HTML or CSS isn't doing what it should, and how to filter out just those stupid chainmails that your Grandma keeps sending without losing anything important. The downside to being good at these sort of things is that people are always asking you to do them.

I am totally the Finder of Lost Things. If you have misplaced your keys, your wallet, your favorite sweater or your baby (kidding! who does that?) I will track that shit down.

An awesome Trivial Pursuit partner. While I specialize in geek trivia (go ahead, ask me anything about Battlestar Galactica.) I'm kind of a sponge and I remember a lot of little tidbits about a multitude of things. Chalk it up to years of watching Jeopardy with Grandma and obsessive internet reading. I am full of useless information.

I will move all of your furniture. Up a fire escape if necessary. Growing up, my family had a business, and part of that business involved used furniture. I spent a lot of time lifting and carrying big stuff. Couple that with a decade of friends and family moving into and out of various houses and apartments and I've gotten pretty good at lifting sofas over my head. Recently, while singlehandedly carrying The Thing That Requires Two People To Move up a narrow staircase, one of my girlfriends exclaimed completely seriously "YOU ARE THE STRONGEST PERSON I KNOW." That was probably an exaggeration, but I am pretty strong for such a tiny lady.

Those are mine. What are your mediocre superpowers?

Decoupage Star Wars heels available here.


Guys! Since I (deliberately) missed last week's Weekend Linkage as I was drinking beer and watching Netflix getting some much-needed R&R, you get twice as many links this week! You can thank me with this.

Go go go!

Does Norway every cease to be charming? Nope.

Consider why you're apologizing.

I can always get behind pizza for breakfast. So obviously breakfast pizza for breakfast is even better.

Teenager Rochelle Ballantyne is set to become the world's first African American female chess master.

Oh gosh. So sweet. Blub blub blub.

Absurdly amazing gourd carving. Yes, I said gourd carving.

Lesser-Known Paradoxes.

#Instacane: The story of Hurricane Sandy told through Instagram.

I think I linked this when Melissa first posted it, and I will continue to link it as many times as she reposts it. The Terrible Bargain We Have Regretfully Struck. Yes yes yes.

32 Mistakes We're All Going to Make. I have already done 26 of these :/

World travelling? It's not a cop-out to spring for the hotel. Why hostels aren't for everyone.

Amazing and haunting street art. Unfortunately, this sort of thing doesn't go over well in the U.S.

As if eating at an antique desk in a restaurant isn't quaint enough, it's full of handwritten notes!

16 strength exercises and stretches for runners.

Are you a poet? Looking for cheap meals for two weeks? You're in luck! Harcase Survival Pinto Bean Sludge.

Ladygamers rejoice! Xbox will now flex the banhammer for sexism on Xbox Live. About time.

My, that's a delicious Death Star.

Do you remember the Dark Crystal? Remember the landstriders? Did you kind of want one too? Well, you're gonna love this:

The flex mex will change your life. No joke:

Air New Zealand just wants to make sure you have a magical and safe flight to Middle Earth:

What's on your agenda this weekend?

New Tunes - BIGkids "Superhero"

Can we talk, awkward, gangly, freckle-faced little girl full of piss and vinegar? I get you. I so, so get you. I even owned a pair of those horrible round glasses when I was your age. Good grief. Get out of my brain.

New Tunes - BIGkids "Superhero"

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